Grid time

I've been so busy the last week, for reasons that Hadyn can explain better than I, that I've got a bit behind on my Gridskipper reading. In fact, I totally missed the fact that not only did Wellington beat Baku in the "Pitch Your Burg" contest, we now have our first official Gridskipper post! It has all the obligatory Wellytown references, including Fat Freddy's Drop, the 'Canes, Waitangi Park, the fact that we're all so over hobbits, and of course, a mis-spelling of "Courtney" Place. It also somehow manages to mention pretty much every Wellington blog in existence. And only one reference to P!

Wellingtonian Wally of the Year: nomination #1

Might we nominate the two adults who thought that taking eight pre-schoolers for a walk through the Terrace Tunnel as 'Wellington Wally of the Year'? Yes, we might.

[photo courtesy of taniwha]

Wir darn darn darn auf der Autobahn

Okay, so that's a lame song-lyric pun, but you try coming up with something wittier when you've just spent 48 hours chained up in fluffy handcuffs and you're writing a post about a craft fair called "Craftwerk". Since this is from the people who brought you BitchCraft, it's not the usual raffia mafia and dodgy doilies: expect more along the lines of Cleavage Girls buttons, knitted posters for Disasteradio, self-published 'zines and teddies with entrails. Yummy.

I could try rewriting the press release, but my brain is still busy recaffeinating, and besides, I have to get the candlewax and lipstick off my tux. So, here's the press release in its entirety.

...

CraftWerk is a bi-monthly craft fair featuring the best and brightest of the Wellington craft scene. The inaugural CraftWerk launches at The Paramount Theatre on the 13th of July from 5.30pm.

CraftWerk will feature a diverse range of: art, handmade items, and indie designer fashion, representing New Zealand's handmade revolution. What sets CraftWerk apart from any other fair is our intention to foster and inspire kiwi crafters without profiting at their expense. Simply think traditional fairs with a twist and you have CraftWerk.

The Paramount Theatre Wellington's oldest Cinema and now its hottest events venue is where CraftWerk calls home. The Paramount's lounge bar is stocked with a wide range of beers and wines as well as soft drinks, snacks and Kapiti ice-cream. This relaxing atmosphere, in the middle of Wellington's hub of entertainment and nightlife, Courtenay Place, allows vendors and shoppers alike a break from the bustle and a chance to absorb the CraftWerk experience.

Right now CraftWerk is accepting applications for vendors. Application details can be located at www.craftwerk.co.nz, or by emailing us. There is no charge for applying; our only pre-requisite is that everything vendors sell is handmade and coming from the bottom of their crafty heart.

Unlike traditional fairs CraftWerk supplies vendors with a table, chair and a private mailing list to share tips, tricks or a crafty shoulder to cry on when the cat turns your wool collection into a bed. Additionally if CraftWerk manages to obtain sponsorship we plan to refund every Vendor a third of their application fee on the night. Yes, yet another thing which makes CraftWerk different from every other fair or market in New Zealand.

CraftWerk only accepts vendors with handmade items. So don't expect any imported second class creations or junk from your Nana's Hat Box. Unless it's a very stylish Hat Box in which case it's probably been converted into a bag. So get your Craft On and be at the Paramount Theatre for a night of Craft on July 13th from 5.30pm

CraftWerk is organised (for love and not for profit) by dedicated crafters Heather Barnes and Sue Tyler. Heather was the genius mind behind BitchCraft and Sue one of the Crafters. Held twice in 2005 BitchCraft was a smashing success. In fact, most vendors had only two complaints: there were too many bodies and they sold out of merchandise! Not a bad problem to have if you're a vendor! Vendors and shoppers told us that BitchCraft was the BEST fair they had ever attended.

Both Sue and Heather are available for interviews to discuss CraftWerk, the rising craft revolution, craft demonstrations and anything else craft related. The only problem might be getting them to stop talking.

For more information - visit www.craftwerk.co.nz or Email: craft@craftwerk.co.nz.

Coupled

It's been a bit quiet up here at Wellingtonista Towers over the last few days, mostly because our two most recent and prolific contributors - Haydn and Tom - have been working flat out on their entry for this year's 48 Hour Film Challenge.

Their hard work has has resulted in 'Coupled' - co-written by Hadyn and starring Tom, and which will screen at 5.45pm tonight (Tusday 30 May) at the Regent Cinema.

No doubt the claims of 'cinematic brilliance' are well founded, so get along to enjoy this, and the other quality and not-so-quality pieces of film-making whipped up in your fair city over the weekend.

For a full list of screening times head over to the official 48 Hours website.

(And for more Wellington-based 48 hours blogging action, check out Talula and Che Tibby (the latter being another member of the Coupled team.))

So. Very. Tired.

This weekend has many things on. I suggest trying them all and seeing how you go.

Watch the Super 14 final (featuring our own, beloved, Hurricanes) while boogieing/shaking/pogoing to Disasteradio/Rhombus/The Eggs. Oh and while you're at it, come up with a random short film on Friday night and have it written, shot and edited by 7pm Sunday.

I'm not going to be so ambitious. I'm just going to be doing the latter.

Here's my plan:

On Friday night I'm going to replace all the blood in my body with pure, uncut caffeine. After the initial jolt ("I can see through time"), Mike and I will sit down and write a script. The next day some suckers actors will convene on set and begin to read the bullshit flowing prose that Mike and I penned at, like, 4am. Then Sunday the editors take over and complete our vision.

This is how it worked last year and we ended up with a film that had the immortal line: "Is that dog wearing a bra?", and just so you know, yes it was. This year we are WAY more planned. Ha!

I'm interested if any of you out there in internet land are participating and if so where and what's your team name. Ours is something to do with Sponge Monkeys.

IMPORTANT NOTICE: Our musician has pulled out at the last minute due to a prior commitment, are there any professional (or otherwise) musos out there who are keen to forgo sleep for a(nother) weekend? If so, drop me a line

Connan & the Mockasins @ Slowboat

The 'next-big-thing' out of Wellington (if you haven't heard that before, then you heard it here first) Connan & the Mockasins have just released their debut EP 'Uuu, It's Teasy', and are celebrating with a free instore concert down at Slowboat Records tomorrow (Thu 25th May) from 5pm.

For those who have yet to witness the true glory of Connan in full flight, imagine a skinny white guy with a big blonde moptop channeling the spirit of Jimi Hendrix and Cream. Or something. The official press release goes on about 'psychedelic blues rock' and suchlike, so maybe that's more meaningful to you. You can hear (and download) some tunes over at their official website, and some samples of the EP at smokecds.

Luxxury

Well, it's all on tonight. If you're not exhausted after seeing the rugger at not-the-Cake-Tin, listening on National Radio to performances by unlikely permutations of small animals, hearing the pipes calling at the Opera House or seeing some obscure up-and-coming band at what I think is still called Indigo, then Sandwiches has a party night for everyone. Electroluxxe is billed as "TechnoElectroRockHouse", thus pretty much covering every genre other than dub, jazz and country. You know how it is: you're with a bunch of people, all with different tastes in music, and no-one can agree: someone likes 80s New Romantic, another one goes for dirty punky electro, someone else likes indie rock and some sad bugger (probably me) prefers 90s techno. So Electroluxxe comes to the rescue with a play list that includes the likes of Duran Duran, Peaches, Bloc Party and Carl Craig. The word "mashup" doesn't even begin to describe it.

Those with especially capacious reserves of energy (and cash) could then explore the most decadent dishes and deranged decor of culinary Wellington or try to track down the latest mystery bar. Here's a hint: one of the commenters has already got it. Here's another: this is possibly the only bar to have actually become classier when it was taken over by Brian Le Gros.

The Hunt Brings Us Life

More NZ Music month goodness is upon us, with the release of the Phoenix Foundation's Samuel Flynn Scott's solo album - 'The Hunt Brings Us Life'.

Those of us lucky enough to receive sneak preview copies were also amused by the very excellent accompanying press release courtesy of 'Prof' Russell Brown, which we recommend you go to and read in its entirety over at Public Address. If only all musical acts could approach their PR with such good humour. (Tellingly enough, the last CD that had anything remotely as good was fellow Phoenecian Luke Buda's PR for his also recently released 'Special Surprise' album, which featured photos of Luke as Rambo and Hercules (although not, we were disappointed to see, Benny from Abba (although, we did fix that))).

As if all this Phoenix Foundation members doing their own thing wasn't enough, we get the added bonus of a broadcast of Scott's other 'other' band - Bunnies on Ponies - live at Bar Bodega, on National Radio tonight (web stream available here). At 7:30pm. When ... hold on ... there's something else on .. around then? Anyway, Scott describes Bunnies on Ponies as...

...hotch potch kind of folk band that combines gentle folk
songs with slightly aggressive improvised arrangements.

We know exactly what he means. And, for those who don't, you can just tune in and find out.

Do you LOVE NZ Music?

Given that it is NZ Music Month and then taking this brilliant post by the Kung Fu Monkey, I give you a "mash-up".

NZ song titles that could also be porn films! [I limited myself to one song per group/artist where I could]

10. Love You Like I Should

9. We Gon' Ride

8. Deb's Night Out

7. Bursting Through

6. She Will Have Her Way

5. Can't Get Enough

4. Soviet Airhostess

3. Can I Play with Your Giant Friend

2. Turn It Around

1. When You Come / It's Only Natural

Please feel free to add more

Super 14 Semifinal

Look out Wellington! There's a Hurricane Warning!!!

::Sigh:: Any one else sick of that pun? Well at best (yes best) it will only be around another week. Tonight at the Caketin the Hurricanes will repeat what they did last week and beat the Waratahs.

Maybe you are one of the lucky individuals who got a ticket in the nanosecond that there were tickets available. I'm not. I will be watching from the warmth of a local drinking establishment chosen by Tom (perhaps one that is not too decadent but just decadent enough).

The Waratahs will be without cocaine snorting Wendell Sailor for the second week. This means Peter Hewat moves to the wing, Mat Rogers takes over fullback and new boy Daniel Halangahu goes to first five. But just in case the 'tahs forget about young Wendell, a local cafe close to the stadium, in Aitken St, is offering a "Wendell Sailor Coke Float" ($4).

She's gonna be a hum-dinger and I suggest that even if you hate rugby that you head out and soak up the atmosphere in town. Also spend some money. Estimates on the money this game will bring in have ranged from $500,000 to $3M. So at least have one drink. The Wellingtonista Crew will drink up the shortfall.

gene pool deletion in progress

Couldn't help but draw more attention to this particular photo, spotted in the Wellington Flickr Photo Pool today. Says maxcherry, the photo-taker...

nothing wrong with towing a motorcycle - can be safely done. The rider has winds just one coil around the bar, and grips the rope under his hand. allows a safe release of the tow in event of trouble - the rider simply releases the rope.

these 'darwin award nominees' had a better idea - their tow-rope was securely knotted to the left fork leg. the bike wasn't registered, and the rider didn't know how to ride a tow - he let the rope go slack. big speed-wobble and legs-akimbo when the tow suddenly tightened and jerked forward around the corner...

If the Earth were a Sandwich...

...our sandwich partner would, give or take a few miles, be Salamanca, Spain. We're not sure if this is the rationale behind the naming of the Kelburn road that shares the name (a quick Google reveals that Lord Wellington fought a famous battle there - in Spain, that is, not up Kelburn way - in 1812, so most likely), but, either way, it's nice to think that we share a tenuous geographic tie with a North Spanish town that looks like it has some pretty nice architecture, a population of around 180000 (about double that in the wider region), and a decent climate. Just like home, eh?

Weirdly enough, the 'if the earth were a sandwich' tool also reveals that the closest New Zealand has to a 'South of France' is the Chatham Islands. Who'd have thought?

Miserable Jafas?

Today's Dominion Post carries an insufferably smug article headlined "The lonely misery of living in Auckland". Like all good journalism these days, this story is based almost entirely upon Google: in this case, the news that a Google Trends search for the word "misery" shows that Aucklanders search Google for this word more often than inhabitants of any other city.

While I agree that living in a sprawling, disconnected agglomeration of suburbs in search of a city would do anyone's head in after a while, I tend towards another explanation. Perhaps it has something to do with a certain highly popular artist and designer who has a boutique in Auckland? Of the top ten Google results for a search on "misery" and "Auckland", eight of them refer to the artist, thus confirming my theory. On the other hand, the remaining two refer to the National Party's policy for Auckland traffic, so perhaps the DomPost has a point. And unless there's a hip new boutique in K Rd called "Lonely", the popularity of that particular word among Aucklanders is harder to explain.

By the way, it looks like the Misery will be spreading to Wellington soon, too. This week's Artsville doco mentioned in passing that a Wellington Misery boutique is on the way, which will be exciting news for devotees of hipster pop-culture dispensaries Popup and Eyeball Kicks (you know who you are).

The Bacon Sarnie Experience

A good name for a band don't you think? Right then, back to my lifelong obsession, the hunt for the Great Bacon Sarnie.

I missed the food show. And I'm not scared of being cuddly.

So I invite all our readers to tell us where the Best Bacon Sarnie can be had. In Wellington preferably, but the Wellingtonista ARE prepared to fire up the Wellymobile & travel for a truly spectacular Bacon Sarnie Experience. We'd consider it a pilgrimage.

Overseas experience

This weekend, if you can tear yourself away from free bacon sarnies and aren't too busy having a bit of a look-see behind the scenes of Wellington's art powerhouses, pop into the Overseas Passenger Terminal to get a glimpse of its proposed transformation.

There will be a public open day on Saturday from 10am to 3pm, featuring plans, drawings, presentations and a scale model. You will be able to discuss the proposal with the designers (Athfield Architects), and there will be presentations at 10:30am and 1pm. This is the first stage of the public feedback process for this proposal and other waterfront developments, and you have until the 9th of June to submit your opinions and suggestions (a tiki bar, perhaps?). There's more information available in the On the Waterfront newsletter and concept design proposal (344kB PDF), and I've got more images and a lot of opinionated thoughts over at WellUrban.